No Comparison

The last week of August, I customarily try to have breakfast or lunch with certain friends whom I don’t see that often. It is a special time for me not only to catch up on our lives but to look ahead, especially with those who have interesting careers—not only in finance, but writers and a few philosophical types.

The other day I had breakfast at the beautiful Hedges Inn in East Hampton with a friend who left me with a quote from Teddy Roosevelt that I thought worthy of sharing: "Comparison is the thief of joy.”

I marinated over these words for a while before I truly understood the meaning: comparing oneself with others is a losing proposition and takes the fun out of life. Some may have a different view of the quote’s real meaning, but I am settled with my interpretation.

What is the human impulse to always compare oneself – our successes and failures—to others? Especially when we have so much to be thankful for? So what if my law firm did not get retained on that multimillion-dollar sale? What if I was not invited to that small dinner party of local luminaries? 

One’s position on the continuum of life’s accomplishments is but a speck, and the range extends indefinitely in both directions. There will always be someone with “more,” and there will always be someone with “less.” Be thankful for what you possess and accept where you are in life, your profession, your retirement, your membership status at that beach club! Accept your status “as is,” and therein lies happiness. I choose to zoom in to find true satisfaction: that first cup of coffee on an early weekend morning, while contemplating cracking open a new book I’ve been waiting to read or diving into the freshly delivered, thick-with-news Sunday New York Times, then deciding I will take as long as I want to do both. No comparison.