According to lore, the origins of the Great Yuba Pass Chili Cook-off, Sierra County’s premier social event, date back to prehistory. According to oral tradition, area native American tribes challenged each other to prove their acorn chili was superior to other tribe’s.

Challenging that oral interpretation is the possibility it was all a joke: nobody was expected to attend. Few Native Americans were stupid enough to meet at the top of the trail in the dead of winter simply to establish bragging rights. Such inane behavior requires white people, which Sierra County now has in spades.

The contest is open to all comers. Showing up is all the entry fee required. No amenities are offered. Cooks must supply everything: heat, pots and pans, tasting dishes, and the chili itself. There are no rules, but many traditions.

Republicans are discouraged from shouting out “LIAR!” That only encourages the opposition, although George Santos now claims to have won last year. In a venue where bribery is not only allowed but expected, truth and justice are malleable commodities.

Progressives indulge in change at their own risk. Chili is generally a time honored and conservative phenomenon. Anne Eldred’s vegetarian chili never fared well. On the other hand JJ’s barely doctored Stagg Chili took first place in the contest’s first recorded history.

Anarchist Don Russell did, at long last, convince both judges and participants that chili can be green. Naturally, Loyalton’s Andy White stole the concept and took several first place awards with his Chile verde. Not that we condemn Andy for that theft: after all, there are no rules. If you say it is chili, it is.

As ever, judging the concoctions usually happens at noonish sharpish. The venue is at the snow park at the top of Highway 49. The area usually gets crowded, between snowmobilers and the milling masses wanting to be fed. Bring tasting cups for any chance to take the People’s Choice Award.

Again, there are no rules, and bribing the judges is absolutely necessary.

The judges have not been named, or at least not announced. We will do our best investigative reporting to discover their identities, although that information may be censored to allow us time for pre-bribery.